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Let’s Keep This Between You and Me

§ February 1st, 2010 § Filed under Learning & Personal Growth § Tagged , , , , , § 2 Comments

Sometimes the path to self-discovery shows us things we might not like about ourselves.

I’ve recently discovered something about myself that I am no particularly pleased with. I’ve probably known it for a long time, but never wanted to admit it or acknowledge it. It makes me cringe just thinking it, to even contemplate admitting it, but, here goes…

I’m lazy.

Deep breathe. Sigh. It’s done. I’ve said it.

Don’t they say that the first step is just to admit you have a problem?

I’m lazy.

Nope. Admitting it again didn’t make me feel any better.

It’s embarrassing really how easily I can fritter away the hours doing absolutely nothing while looking busier than chipmunk.

Last night I had a million and one brilliant ideas for blog posts, articles, workshops, books, events, art journaling, a video book review, and even an online tutorial for mind mapping.

This morning, blah. Nothing. No energy. No enthusiasm. No activity.

I might as well be wearing cement boots. I just can’t seem to get started. The lazy gene has been activated with a nuclear reactor and I sit here staring into space. (Well, I am writing this post, but that’s not counting for much today.)

Today is an anniversary of sorts and I think that is one reason I am out of sorts. Today marks 90-days since I walked out of the door and left my corporate job behind. 90-days. Twelve weeks. Three months. No matter how I look at it, it just seems like time draining away as my lazy butt sits around and looks out the window.

I can be quite productive when I want to be. And, I’ve had a few whirlwinds the last few months, but today isn’t one of them.

Maybe I’m not lazy. Maybe I am just beating myself up for not being as productive as I thought I’d be over the past 90-days.

Either way, I feel better now. You know my little secret. But, promise me something? Let’s just keep it between you and me. Okay? Thanks.

I’ll be back tomorrow and maybe, just maybe, I might finish that video book review.

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