Finding My Voice Again

The Blank Page It’s been awhile, over a year in fact, since I’ve sat down at the computer to write every day.

When I first started The Dreaming Café in 2009 I had no idea what I was doing. I had no big plans. My whole target was to just write every day and share whatever I was doing or learning in a way that hopefully inspired, entertained or informed my readers – all 17 of them. It didn’t really matter who or how many people read what I wrote, it really was all about sharing my writing, something I hadn’t done in almost 25-years.

But, after having written and shared over 600 blog posts and newsletter articles since then I’ve suddenly found myself overtaken by word fright. It’s kind of like stage fright, except instead of being transfixed with fear by stage lights and a live audience it is the glaring brightness of a blank computer screen and an unknown audience of readers hovering just out of sight that has me frozen, unable to move, think or write.

What’s up with that?

Why now? What’s going on?

Have I lost my voice?

I hear the voices of dozens of so-called experts who whisper in my ear telling me that I need to pick a niche, blog every day, optimize my posts for the search engines, have a plan, build an audience-FAST, monetize my blog, blah, blah, blah.

And, I hear my own self-doubt above it all…Who wants to read about YOU? You’ve changed a lot in the last year. Your readers aren’t interested in what you have to say now. Do you really have anything to say?

But, you know what? That’s all BULLSHIT. All of it. It’s not real. It’s just fear. And, as Steven Pressfield reminded me, it’s the amateur talking.

The amateur fears that if he turns pro and lives out his calling, he will have to live up to who he really is and what he is truly capable of.”

The only way to find my voice again and to drown out the voices of fear and resistance is to write every day, to be a Pro and to sit my butt in the chair and to do what I am called to do regardless of anything else.

It’s time to take a deep breath and put my fingers to the keyboard and just do it, just write and write and write some more.

Have you ever had this experience? Have you ever let fear and resistance stop you from doing what you are truly capable of?

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Related posts:
My own words helped remind me too of why I write…Would I write if no one read what I wrote?

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Books:
These are the Steven Pressfield books referred to in this post that have a permanent place in my personal library. (and, full disclosure, these are Amazon Affiliate links.)


2 Responses to Finding My Voice Again
  1. Sandy
    December 2, 2013 | 6:50 pm

    Wow, Mark, YES, I do remember you. We connected via Ken Robert. It feels so good to be writing regularly again. Give it a try.
    Thanks for taking the time to leave a comment!
    Warmly,
    Sandy

  2. Mark DeBord
    December 2, 2013 | 5:28 pm

    Hey Sandy! It’s been a long time, I fear you probably don’t remember me. But, back in 2009 I started writing and gave it up because life (and a full time job) got in the way. Like you I have been fearful; I even wrote about it back when I had the time to. Maybe it’s time for me to make time again as well. Good to see you writing again.

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