When I worked a full-time day job I had lots of time alone.
I spent sixty to ninety minutes a day alone in my car commuting to and from work. Time alone to listen to audio books and my own thoughts.
I had an office, not a cubicle and I spent most of my day working alone. Hours on end. It really was blissful.
Lunch times breaks were often visits to the bookstore.
On the way home in the evening if traffic was really heavy I would get off the highway and have a nice, quiet dinner alone, just me, a book and my journal.
Sometimes I’d stop at the bookstore or art store, just to wander around.
Now that I work from home, all of that free time and alone, at least most of it, is gone.
After four months I was beginning to feel like I was going crazy. Plus, I felt stale. My brain was feeling very dull and uncreative. I felt dull and uncreative. I was moody, depressed and just felt discombobulated.
This weekend I decided I just had to do something about it. For my own sanity and well-being I needed time alone.
I realized that if I am going to be successful working from home, that taking some time for myself is equally important as actually working. I have to learn to set boundaries and claim time for myself. I have to make scheduling some time alone daily and weekly a priority.
Then I remembered Julie Cameron’s artist dates.
“An Artist Date is a block of time, perhaps two hours weekly especially set aside and committed to nurturing your creative conscious, your inner artist. In its primary form, the artist date is an excursion, a play date that you preplan and defend against all interlopers. You do not take anyone on this artist date but you and your inner artist, a.k.a. your creative child.”
Right then and there I decided I was taking Monday all for myself.
And, I outlined a list of priorities and made a plan:
Minimum of four hours of uninterrupted time alone.
Travel time – at least 30 minutes or more in the car.
Beverage availability and clean restroom facilities were a must.
No laptop, internet, email, phone calls or text messaging.
Lots of light and places to sit, read and write.
And, it had to be peaceful, quiet.
Here is what I did…
I have to say, my artist date was an absolutely delightful day. I feel rejuvenated, re-energized and relaxed.
Causal is okay, but no sweats or pj’s. You are a professional and this is a professional work environment.
2. Connect with others.
Take time everyday to engage with people on social networking sites like Twitter and Facebook. Read and comment on other people’s blogs. Send and answer a few personal emails. Skype a friend. Arrange a lunch date. Yes, connecting with others takes time, time out of your day and time away from your work, but if you shared an office with other people how much time would you spend connecting? It’s just as important when you work out of your home office.
3. Work with a project or editorial calendar and a to-do list.
Knowing ahead of time what needs to be done on any given day provides structure. It helps you to dive right in and get started. It also can help signify the end of the work day. When today’s to-do list is complete, or all the “A” items are done you know the work day is over. You then have a choice, continue to work or call it a day.
4. No eating in the home office.
A cup of tea or coffee is fine, but no snacks. A home office is for working, not eating.
5. Take a break.
Have a snack or a meal while sitting down at the dining room or kitchen table. If the weather is pleasant, eat outside on the deck or picnic table. Use real silverware, plates and napkins. Treat yourself well. You deserve it.
6. Celebrate.
If you just finished a big project or received some good news reward yourself and celebrate. Take your spouse, kids or a friend to lunch. Send an email to all your friends. Tweet your celebration and invite others to celebrate with you.
7. Remember who’s the boss.
No one can tell you what to do or when to do it. That means you have to be the boss. You have to make the decisions and keep your commitments.
8. Working from a home office is about working.
Remind yourself, your family and friends, that when you are in your home office you are working. You are a professional. You have work to do. No one is going to do it for you. Even if your ‘office’ is a corner of a room, or the kitchen table for a few hours, respect the space and what it represents.
When I joined Derek Sivers email list last year he sent me a personal note.
“Wow!” I thought. “This is real!! And, way cool.”
I thought about what it meant to me to be contacted personally, not just with an autoresponder, by the man behind the blog/website.
I realized I wanted to do that. I wanted to connect with people and know more about them. I wanted my readers / subscribers to be more than just a faceless name in a database.
Today, I too, email all of my new subscribers. Sometimes it may not be right away, but I do contact them. And, if they have a blog or website and they share it with me, I check it out. If they are on Twitter and share their ID, I follow them and say hello.
It’s not a marketing ploy. It’s about connecting to people, getting to know them better and building a community.
I know how much it meant to me when Derek emailed me and if someone has taken the time to subscribe to my newsletter I want them to know that I appreciate it.
This morning Chris Guillebeau at The Art of Non-Conformity shared what commitment meant to him in the post Overnight Success, Year Three. What he wrote about resonated with me and reflects my own commitments to myself and my readers.
These two posts led me to think about my own my commitments and promises to myself, especially those related to The Dreaming Cafe. They were the catalyst for me to write this post.
Over the last few weeks I have been thinking of ways to reach more people, to grow The Dreaming Cafe. In addition to just personally emailing new newsletter subscribers and answering emails from readers, I wanted to commit to reaching my readers more consistently. I wanted people to know they could rely on me to be here for them to share stories and resources to help them on their creative journey to self discovery.
I know how I feel when I find a new blog and connect with what the writer has to say only to discover they post sporadically, only once or twice a week, or only once a month. I feel frustrated and disappointed.
I don’t want people to feel that way when they visit The Dreaming Cafe. I want them to know that I will be here, consistently, just about every day. To make this happen I set the goal of having 500 blog posts by December 31, 2010. This means writing and posting five to six times per week for the rest of the year.
Keeping my promises to myself and to my readers is extremely important. It’s a matter of honor and self respect and about respecting those who have joined The Dreaming Cafe community.
So, here is my commitment to you, the reader:
Weekly newsletter – emailed every Sunday, 5am EST – Personal stories, recommendations and resources written especially for those on the creative journey to self discovery.
Follow all new subscribers on Twitter. (Don’t forget to tell me who you are.)
Friend all new subscribers on Facebook. (Again, don’t forget to tell me who you are.)
Personally email all new subscribers and find out more about them and how I, and The Dreaming Cafe, can help them.
500 blog posts by December 31, 2010 – Sharing stories, videos, tips, resources, book reviews, interviews, and anything else related to the creative journey to self discovery.
(This article was originally published in The Dreaming Cafe newsletter, Issue No. 51 Sunday, January 3, 2010.
Five Ways You Can Make a Difference
1. Smile – No matter how you feel, or what is going on, smile. Smile when someone holds the door open for you; greet your children with a smile when they come home from school; smile when the dog pees on the floor; smile when you are standing in the checkout lane at the grocery store; smile while you are brushing your teeth; smile whenever you realize you’re not. You will be amazed at the power of a simple smile.
2. Listen – When someone speaks to you decide to really listen. Don’t think about a story you want to share that relates to what they are talking about, don’t think about what you want to talk about, and don’t drift off. Really listen, repeat back what they’ve said in the form of a question to make sure you heard them correctly, or ask a question that invites them to tell you more. Do this with your children, your spouse, a co-worker, a friend and a stranger and discover how listening makes another person feel important and special, and how it makes you feel.
3. Touch – As social beings we all crave the touch of another human being. All living creatures do. Children who are not held or touched during the first few months of their lives often fail to thrive and may die or grow up severely emotionally and psychologically handicapped. Don’t invade a person’s personal space or touch someone with any form of aggression. A touch should be quick, soft, and barely noticeable, like a gentle breeze. Don’t force it. It should be natural. Try gently touching your child’s head while beading over to see what he/she is drawing for you; reach out to hold your spouses hand while watching a movie together; touch a friends shoulder or arm while speaking; hug your Mom, your Dad, your brother, your sister. The lasting effect of a gentle hug, or touch, can feel like magic.
4. Share – Tell someone, your spouse, child, parent, sibling, friend or co-worker how much having them in your life means to you. Share with them the goodness you see in them; share how much they bring to the world just by being themselves; think of five positive things you can say about the person and share your list with them. Share by telling them verbally or in writing. The mere act of thinking of the other person in a positive way will create a shift inside your own heart and when you share how you feel with the other person, lovingly, honestly and authentically, you may be amazed at the positive shift in your relationship as a whole.
5. Be Kind - We have heard about the power of ‘random acts of kindness’, but how many of us actually practice kindness on a daily basis? Hold the door for someone; let the car racing up next to you merge in front of you; pick up your neighbors trash cans; stop to help if you see someone in distress; do something without the thought of being paid back; make a fresh pot of coffee for your coworkers. Let go of petty grievances. Accept that we are all human, we all make mistakes, we all act without thinking sometimes and that we all have ‘troubles’. Be kind and accepting of one another. Don’t judge. They are so many ways we can be kind towards one another even if it is just smiling, listening, sharing, and touching. Be kind toward yourself first, then allow your kindness to overflow to all those around you.
These are not earth shattering, splashy, ‘let’s save the world’ ways to make a difference. But, if we all adopted just one of these strategies and made it a part of our daily lives imagine what an impact it would have in our homes, our workplaces, our communities and the world.
You can make a difference. The difference starts with you. It starts inside of you. It starts small, like a raindrop, but builds and flows outward like a tidal wave.
“Be the change you want to see in the world.” Mahatma Gandhi
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If you are going to practice medicine or law, do medical research, design bridges, or some other type of specialized, professional work, then, yes, you do need a degree and more than likely you will need an advanced degree.
But, for just about everything else, the world is changing.
I have swung back and forth between the argument for and against the need for a college degree.
Personally, I never finished my bachelor’s degree, but longed to have a PhD.
Make sense?
Well, it depends on how you look at it.
I love to learn. I love to research. I love to read, write and share what I know. All traits of a life long student and teacher.
These ‘loves’ have led me on a life long search for knowledge, but unfortunately it has failed to produce a bachelor’s degree, let alone a PhD.
Why?
Because, I love to learn, I love to research, I love to read, write and share what I know.
It’s a catch 22.
I love to learn so much and I changed my major so many times, and I took so many classes I thought were interesting that I failed to complete any single advanced degree program.
A few of my majors: Civil Engineering, Nutrition/Dietetics, Environmental Science, Geography, Sociology, Biology/Nutrition, Behavioral Science, and a few more I don’t remember.
I took classes just because they sounded interesting. Some of the more memorable ones (because of what I learned and the passion the professor had for his/her subject)- Applied Calculus, Statistics, Energy & Society, Poverty & Welfare, and Advance Composition-Writing an UnderGrad Thesis.
I have had two, very successful careers without a bachelors degree- one in the nutrition field (I did earn a two-year degree and passed a national registration exam) and one in Logistics/Transportation/Distribution.
Now, I am embarking on a third-as a writer and a teacher and a few more things I am still trying to label and define.
I am an ‘expert’ in a variety of areas, areas I have focused on and spent years studying and areas/topics I have a passion for.
I may still go back to school to pursue an advanced degree, but the thing is I don’t have to have a degree to do what I want – to work for myself, to teach, to help people, to write, and to make a difference.
When universities like MIT offer “the full syllabi, lecture notes, class exercises, tests, and some video and audio for every course MIT offers, from physics to art history” online for free – that changes the world.
Will everyone take advantage of it?
No.
But, for those that do, watch out. They are independent, curious, self-disciplined and eager to learn. They will be the ones who launch new products and services, start new businesses and lead change in our economy and our world.
I am excitedly watching a young man I know explore this new world. He is bright and inquisitive. He has downloaded several courses onto is iPhone and studies in between working a full-time job, raising two small children, learning computer animation, building a music career and supporting his wife in her goals and dreams. It will be interesting to see where this all leads as everything he is doing and learning starts to come together.
So what has this all got to do with you?
I am trying to prove to you that you do not need an ‘official degree’ in all cases to do what you want.
You can take classes, read, attend workshops and seminars and study anything you want. You can even attend lectures by top university professors at One Day University.
You can learn what you need and learn what you want in non-traditional ways and do what you want – all without having to earn a degree.
And, some things, you don’t even need to learn anything more (unless you want to). You may already possess all the skill and knowledge you need to get started today.
During a recent conversation with a friend we were talking about her passion for cooking and her need for some extra money. I suggested she teach a cooking class. She said “I would need a degree to do that.”
“To teach cooking? No, you don’t.” I responded. “You may need some health department approvals or inspections, but, honey, you don’t need a degree. You aren’t teaching at a culinary institute, you’re teaching people like me and all I care about is if you can teach me to cook like you.”
Regardless of whether you are changing careers, moving back into the workforce after raising your children or starting your own business, more than likely you have the skills, knowledge and passion to do what you want-without a degree.
The question is, what do you want?
Once you know that, the resources are out there for you to learn what you need and to start doing what you love today, with or without a degree.
(This article was originally published in The Dreaming Cafe newsletter, Issue No. 33 Sunday, August 30, 2009. If you enjoyed this article you can subscribe HERE)
Every day I am on the receiving end of poor customer service. It happens in restaurants, in grocery stores, department stores and even doctor’s offices.
It drives me crazy because it is all so unnecessary.
Today is the time for businesses to be looking to convert casual customers and clients to loyal fans and supporters. The number one key for doing that is excellent, five-star customer service.
Now, I do not blame the employees for this bad service. I hold the owners and managers responsible.
As a longtime manager, and as a customer, here are a few things an owner/manager can do to improve their customer service…
Treat your employees with respect and they will treat your customers with respect. Treat them like they don’t count and they will treat your customers the same way.
Your attitude is mirrored by your employees. If you are miserable, angry and/or frustrated and walk around all day frowning and scowling, so will your employees. If you smile, great people like you are happy to see them (which you should be) and are pleasant to be around, then, more than likely, so will your employees.
Hire slow and fire fast. Take your time when hiring employees. Don’t just hire ‘bodies’. And, when someone isn’t working out and you’ve worked with that person to resolve the issues, get rid of them. One bad apple can ruin the bunch.
Don’t assume ‘experience’ means anything. How will you employees know how you operate your business and what you expect unless you tell them? Don’t just stick them behind a counter or a phone and expect them to treat your customers the way you want them to be treated. Work with your employees, train them, explain to them what their role is and how they contribute to the organization as a whole. Take the time to build a team, a community with your employees.
Treat everyone like a customer. This means your employees, your suppliers, the delivery man, the maintenance man, etc. Everyone you come into contact with is a customer…and your employees should have this same philosophy, too.
One more thing, when you are at work…work. It’s not a social hour, or study time. Make sure your employees understand that while they are on the clock and you are paying them that their whole focus is the job and the customer. Teach them to be present in the moment.
As an owner or a manager your customers and clients are who keep you in business. Remember that your employees are a direct extension of you and your business. Help them make the best possible impression and they will help you build long-term customer relationships and loyal fans and supporters.
