Wishing Life Away

Continuing with yesterday’s theme, each day this week I will post the lead article from a previous edition of The Dreaming Cafe’s weekly newsletter.

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“I wish I could lose 10lbs.”

“I wish I’d gone to college right out of high school.”

“I wish we had a million dollars.”

“I wish…”

Are any of these ‘wishes’ familiar? Can you add a few of your own?

Often times we say these types of things without really giving it much thought. But, they are distracting and they move us out of our current time and place. It is important to remember our past, and to plan for the future, but it is more important to be fully in the present moment.

Have you ever been around someone who is truly mindful of the present moment? When you talk to them, they really listen, time seems to slow down a little. What about when you are happily engaged in something you enjoy? Time seems to stand still.

Here are my ‘Fav Five‘ tips to breaking the habit of ‘wishing life away’:

• When you catch yourself ‘wishing’ take three deep breaths and bring yourself back to the present moment, the people you are with and the activity you are engaged in.
• Examine your ‘wish’. Is it actually a goal you want to pursue?
• Regardless of how happy or hurtful a past event was, let it go. Don’t dwell on it. Focus on this moment in time and what you are doing today. (If a past event is particular painful and you are having difficulty letting it go, maybe you need professional help to move through the experience. Find someone in your area by going to Psychology Today-Find a Therapist.)
• It is important to plan for the future, whether it is your retirement, your children’s education or your next vacation. Just don’t obsess about it. Identify the action steps necessary to make a future event happen, take those steps and let it go. Check in occasionally to make sure things are going according to plan and if they are not, take corrective action and move on.
• Take time for yourself every day. It can be five minutes or thirty minutes. The longer the better. Engage in some activity that has meaning for you. A walk. Reading. Cooking. Meditation or prayer. Any activity that is important to you. This is important for all family members including children. Everyone in the household should have time to themselves to do the things they enjoy and that adds meaning to their lives.

How do you remind yourself to stop ‘wishing life away’ and stay in the present moment? Email me and share your tips, comments or suggestions. Sandy@TheDreamingCafe.com